Melancholia and the Daisy Chain
My morning ritual consists of coffee and usually Portuguese olive oil cake or Cree bannock. I love scooping the coffee into the machine and while it’s percolating placing breakfast onto a small tea saucer. The bone china tall ship cup is my favorite. Both of these go on an ornate tray where I bring them back to my bed and check email and the news. Sometimes I pull a playing card, tarot, or the Sibyls Oraculum. Sometimes I just roll the dice. This has been my ritual every day that I’ve lived in Chicago and perhaps every day before then. I love making the bannock, cooking my own meals, and adding herbal medicines to whatever I’m creating. Part of this ritual is to create consistency, the other part is to create balance because as long as I can remember depression has been a part of my life. There are times when I’m happy, excited, and inspired and there are times when I’m so down I can barely get out of bed and get myself to the pool or for a bike ride. There are even times when I find it hard to work.
The days that I’m depressed I wake up with the heaviness of what feels like swords a la Our Lady of Sorrows deep in my heart. I push myself to do day to day business. Sometimes I succeed and other times I don’t.
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